he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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