I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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