Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
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did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
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I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
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