i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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