just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize