whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize