Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
