one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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