i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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