so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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