I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Randomize
