Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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