I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
being pregnant is like rehab
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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