I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
