I will die if light touches me.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
