just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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