The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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