That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
