everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Randomize
