Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize