did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Randomize
