She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
