If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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