So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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