I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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