whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
