Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
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VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
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The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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