I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I wear drunk well.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
