You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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