PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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