North Korea, Best Korea!
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby