Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
