I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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