I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize