My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
so let's talk penis.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize