I hope mine doesn't look like that
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
