my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize