You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
