There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Randomize
