some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize