Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
no. you can't hotbox the world.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Randomize
