I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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