Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
