Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize