spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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