Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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