I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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