We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize