a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
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