She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
